Why I Couldn’t Walk Through Tragedy Alone

In 2002, David and I decided to pack up our family and our belongings in Southeast Texas and settle down in Indiana, closer to our families. This was an extremely difficult decision because our community of friends and co-workers had come alongside us during the most horrific time in our lives. They had graciously supported us with prayers, love, and acts of kindness after David’s accident and we hated to leave them behind. But, day to day life was emotionally draining as we constantly were reminded of our life before the accident and our newfound reality. As we sat down to dinner, we’d remember meals and laughter around the same table. As we sat in the church sanctuary on Sunday mornings, we’d remember how we used to lead the youth ministry program. It seemed as though our lives were divided into two timeframes- before and after. And we were having a difficult time moving forward.

With much prayer and a boatload of faith, we decided we all needed a fresh start- a new beginning.

We worried that the small farming community we were relocating to might be hesitant to welcome newcomers into their mix, especially a family that looked a bit different. We worried if we’d fit in.

Shortly after getting settled into our new home, our worries flew right out the window. This community embraced us and extended love to our family. We immediately got plugged into church activities, Lion’s Club, Home Ec. Club, PTO, sports teams, and choir groups. The kind way that this community has loved on us has helped our family move forward instead of getting stuck in the past. Our physical, spiritual and emotional healing has been greatly impacted by our new (and old) friends.

To begin to describe all the ways community has impacted our lives feels like an impossible task. God has shown us His provision, love, and care through the people we’ve come to adore. When David has been in and out of surgery and illness, our community has come alongside us and offered countless prayers, delivered amazing home-cooked meals, and watched over our children when we couldn’t. As we’ve adjusted to new realities, they’ve surprised us by coming over and doing yard work for us. These people have laughed with us, cried with us, and mourned with us.

It has been through the people around us that I’ve seen the hand of God at work. When we were unsure if David would survive, I prayed to God for mercy. He answered that prayer with a waiting room full of people who love David and our family, who provided comfort, care, and met physical needs during the waiting process. When we prayed for new beginnings, God answered that prayer with a community of people who embraced us in our fragility, and loved us even though they didn’t have to.

Throughout our entire journey, I’ve made requests of God, and so often He has responded with community.

God has blessed us with life-long friends sprinkled across the country. For that, we are truly grateful. Life isn’t intended to be done on our own. Special people are placed by our side, some for a lifetime and others for shorter periods of time. Nonetheless, these people hold a dear place in our hearts and are a part of our story. They have helped shape us into who we have become. They have all played a role in helping us move past the moment our lives drastically changed on August 20, 1999. It is because of them that I know with certainty that God is caring, loving, and kind. It is because of them that we know God better. I am confident that we would not be where we are without our friends and family.